Please share your stories of Ben with his family and friends. Always the life and soul of any party or team, Ben was unforgettable…
Your stories
A dear friend
Mike England
Laughter. Fun. Leader. Dear Friend. But a few words capturing my fond times growing up with Ben. A beacon of energy with a thirst for life. So many good times together learning about friendship, drinking, girls, trouble, adventure. Our crazy trip to Brittany in the blue mini metro. What were we thinking? Only Ben could have used his big personality to convince the owner of that fine restaurant in that little French town to offer up a Chateauneuf du pape grand cru on a free trial. We needed a faster get away car! Food consumption of world record proportions was a walk in the park for Ben. Volume. Always on the highest levels; just we way we liked it. Everyone knew Ben was in the room and the room vibrated in admiration for the laughter, jokes and banter that resonated. Family. Always at the centre of Ben's universe. Fun. Those Christmas Eve pub crawls will always go down in legend. The annual reciting of our communal Christmas poem 'T'was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, nothing was stirring, not even the mouse'...….donned in Christmas boiler suits and fancy dress, breaking all of the rules, friends together. Memories that will last forever. Our heartfelt thoughts and prayers are with you all. Mike
Dance floor antics!
Clare
HANDS UP who has been knocked off their feet and swung around the dance floor by Ben?
We were at a ball with the Newbald crew a couple of years ago as usual the drinks were flowing and everyone’s party tricks were coming out! We were making an effort to liven up the ball and of course were the LOUDEST and most raucous table there. The live band comes on and I’m minding my own business dancing away on the dance floor, I suddenly get scooped up in a giant bear hug by these big strong arms and swung around until I’m dizzy then dropped off where I was picked up! I learn at subsequent parties this is a “Ben” special and I started to get prepared for it at every event!
I would give everything to be swung round on the dance floor by Big Ben just one more time... and I promise I wouldn’t tell you off Ben or even complain that I was sat next to you again at a dinner party 🎈
Sleep tight and shine bright xxx
Ben.
James (1 pint ahead) stedman
Unfortunately my literacy skills will fail me at this point.
I’m one of the band of merry men from school, I joined ecclesbourne in the 3rd year as it was then and that’s when I first met what was to because one of my best friends.
I may see Ben through red tinted 👓glasses or as someone who started our little gatherings with when we would sneak drinks from our parents drinks cabinets or get our first kiss with some lucky lady behind the cinema on a Friday night before being picked up by our parents.
From 13 to 44 there are just to many stories to many memories to many moments to put down.
But I think for me my favourite story / stories of Ben are the ones that I’m reading on here or on FB or texts from other friends, it just shows me that one of my best friends ment so much to so many other people, and it gives me even more memories of the great man.
Big Mac, egg, beer, hugging machine, human megaphone, the drunkest man at my wedding, friend, farther, husband, brother, son,
Ben you touched the heart of so many people, I’m going to miss you buddy.
To Tracy Poppy Harry Oli Sarah Derek & Pauline, I’m so so very sorry for your loss and can not comprehend what you are going through and I wish with my whole heart that there was something I could do to make things better.
Jx
My Friend Ben
Stephen Wilson (Weave)
I first met Ben in 1977! How can it possibly be 41 years ago?
I arrived late into Walter Evans infant school having transferred from another school and in my memories Ben was already the focus of everything that was going on at school. That may or may not have been the reality (I was only 4) but having known him for nearly half a century since he has pretty much always occupied that position.
I am sure I have uttered the phrase “you know my friend Ben” thousands of times over the past thirty years or so. It was always followed by the response, “yeah I know Ben, he was the one who…….”
You can fill in the blanks yourself; here are a few common responses:
• Ate the big Mac in one
• Ate the boiled egg with its shell on at your stag do
• Ate the other boiled egg whole in one swallow on your stag do
• Was always in fancy dress
• Wore frilly women's underwear on his birthday because he knew he was going to be ”wedged” at school
When I asked “do you remember my friend Ben” of course everyone did remember him because he was someone it was very hard to forget. Whether you met him once on a night out or were lucky enough, as I was, to count him as one of your very closest friends he made an indelible mark.
Those of us who did count Ben as a close friend will never ever forget him and as heartbroken as we are now we know how lucky we have been to have him in our lives.
…I remember playing Rugby for school on a Saturday morning when we had only left Ritzy’s the night before at about three in the morning. All nursing hangovers and sharing the pain of losing by about 50 points.
…I remember Ben’s ill-judged attempt to tie our Maths teacher to a tree on our final day at Ecclesbourne, everyone else could see Mr Randle was not in the mood for a bit of harmless fund but Ben carried on regardless.
…I DON'T remember much of the year Ben worked for Carlsberg/Tetley , largely because of the unidentifiable white cans of beer from the brewery shop, of which you could drink all you wanted for a fee of £1.
…I do remember Ben’s brainwave of buying a scooter to commute to Burton. A plan which did not end well, particularly for the scooter.
There were countless nights out and adventures as we grew from infants to juniors to students. Dozens of stag do’s and impromptu nights out which turned into epic adventures which we then reminisced about for the next 25 years.
But I also remember the family times since. There was no question who would be the first family we would invite to stay on our new house when we moved in two years ago.
There were brilliant family camping trips with Ben, Tracey, Poppy and Harry and sometimes with Stuart and Michelle or Tracey’s sister Clare and their families. I was looking forward to so many more of these.
Ben was the best friend you could ever have wanted to have just as he was undoubtedly the best Husband, Dad, Brother and Son.
We will do all we can to support Tracey and the kids of the coming weeks, months and years. Those family events will continue and at each one we will raise a glass to OUR friend Ben.
A Gentle Giant
Andy Marfleet
I first met Ben many years ago through my University friend Ben Johnson. It was clear that all the boys who went to school together in Derby had a very close bond. The first thing I learnt about Ben was that he was just such a friendly and approachable bloke. When first introduced, you were almost intimidated by his size, but despite this, he was one of the most down to earth, friendly and approachable blokes you could ever wish to meet. Some people just have an ability to put others at ease, and he had this gift in buckets. A real gentle giant. The second thing I learnt was not to get stuck at the bar with him for too long, he destroyed me on more than one occasion!.
I was incredibly saddened to hear the news last week. There will never be a finer example of the phrase "the good die young". My deepest condolences to Tracey, Poppy and Harry and all of Ben's family. RIP Big Man.
Ben, Me and the pigs head
Ian Wood
Ben and I spent one morning very carefully learning how to butcher one of our rare breed pig. It was the first time for Ben so with a Gin & Tonic in one hand and a very large carving knife in the other we began to drink (I mean butcher) after a few more G & T’s and a hand full of sausages, pork chops, and belly pork, Ben decided he wanted to take home its head, to which he did, can’t remember what he said he was going to do with it, but I think a month or two later Tracey threw it out.
My first boss
Nicola
What a lovely website and brilliant way to share memories. Ben was my first ever boss and taught me so much, so brilliant at work but always with a sense of humour and far better at Polo than all of us! It was clear how very much he loved his family, Tracey, Poppy and Harry I am thinking of you and sending you all my love.
One of a kind....
Ben Johnson
Reflecting on my shared history and experiences with Ben, it's impossible not to smile at the sheer amount of fun he crammed into life. We became friends at secondary school, bonding at the tender age of 14 over 'vodka con limons' on the school exchange trip to Malaga. We then went on to become firm friends amongst a group of 8 or 10 at school who still see each other regularly now. Many happy memories of nights out in Derby (we would often use Ben as a human shield as we tried to get past the bouncers at various bars in Sadler Gate), summer evenings at his parents house and of course the Duffield Christmas Eve pub crawls. Ben absolutely loved childish pranks; one of our traditions in the sixth form at school was on your birthday you would have your underwear forcibly removed by a group of 'friends'. On Ben's 18th birthday, after a mighty struggle we eventually managed to pin him down and get on with the job in hand, but couldn't find any underwear.... delving a little deeper we eventually located a pair of ladies lacy underwear which he had put on specially for the day, much to everyone's disgust and amusement. He will be remembered for his incredible capacity for drinking and eating at speed; a Big Mac in one mouthful, a hard boiled egg swallowed in one (including the shell) and literally hundreds of pints necked in one - many people will know of the awe and terror he could cause when within striking distance of a bar; a formidable and enthusiastic drinker. His golf will also live long in the memory; a gravity defying slice or hook and 'mickey mouse' sweat patches - he loved a good sweat. Beyond all the bravado though, he was an immensely caring and supportive friend, husband, father, son, and brother. Always looking after those who were close to him and taking the time to make sure you were OK. I remember on our school-friend Jon's stag weekend in Newcastle, at the end of one night ending up in a long embrace with him in the hotel corridor, talking about emotions and crying rather loudly (Big Ben did everything loudly) - so much so we woke up another guest who ran into the corridor to confront us and swiftly ran back into his room when he saw two 6ft plus men in a sweaty, snotty embrace. I loved this soft side of the big man - beyond all the noise he was one of the most caring people I've ever known. Big Ben, I will miss you more than you will ever know and can't imagine life without you. So sad to lose you far too young, and for Tracey, Poppy & Harry to lose a loving husband and father. You really were one of a kind.
Love, 'Little' Ben x
Bigger than life
Fee
I was blessed to be able to call him a friend, albeit too briefly. A big man in so many ways...... stature, kindness, fun, and the ability to drink (even me) under the table. Who am I going to have a 'paella-off' with now?! My world is a sadder one from this point forward. Love always Big Ben. xxx
With us forever
Carl
Congratulations to those involved in putting this website together. It is such a lovely tribute to read such wonderful memories of Ben, a real tribute to the larger-than-life, infectiously happy, loving and caring – and occasionally mischievous - person that he was.
And memories are so very important. Although Ben is no longer with us physically, he lives on through us, through our memories. Every time we think of him, he is still present amongst us. I do not mean in a spiritual sense. I mean in a real sense. Remembering Ben, as we will all continue to do, means that he is still touching us, having an effect on us – and that means that he is still there.
Harry and Poppy: hold on to that thought. Every time you think of your Dad, he will be there. Every time we think of your Dad, he will be there. For you. For us. For ever.
Hugs, Wine and Bread Rolls
Tori May
Ben was one of those rare and amazing guys who oozed everything delicious you could want from a friend; joy, happiness, friendship, concern, fun, jokes, generosity, decency, silliness, love, knowledge and care. I first met Ben with Tracey in Nottingham at their then home when Eddie May first introduced me to his so solid crew just after we had made ourselves ‘official’ 16 years ago. Big Ben was the very first of the boys’ group that I got to meet that night and I couldn’t have wished to have been made more welcome as the new girlfriend on the block.
My memories of Ben span so much but I’ll forever remember him for these treasured moments. Ben was the Toast Master of our Wedding - the most amazing voice who helped march everyone through our special day & night at the right time and all in the right places according to my intricate Bridezilla agenda he had. The perfect job for Ben. His love was so much for everyone that he simply loved hugs - my biggest most memorable hug was with Ben on the steps of the country house on my Wedding Day in my Wedding Dress. His overzealous hug led to his entire glass of red wine landing artistically all over my Wedding dress. An utterly distraught Ben led to even more hugs but I couldn’t care less about the wine; we had done the wedding, done the photos, done the food and the dress was just a by-product by that stage - we just grabbed a bottle of white wine, poured it entirely all over the red on the dress, grabbed some more white and swigged from the bottle together. For the record, every ounce of that red wine came out of the dress thanks to the white wine and Ben’s prayers.
Wherever we were, Ben was always the first to make sure you had a drink, were OK and were relaxed - a trait that is so special. On countless times we would always know that he would be the host with the most regaling us with the most interesting of stories. He was the one that instinctively knew everyone’s favourite tipple and always had me topped up with a g&t. I had never seen anyone bolt a pint before I had met Ben and was even more thrilled when Tracey did the same. The perfect couple. And then the perfect father who later introduced us to Poppy & Harry with pure pride and adoration.
My last wonderful phone conversation with Ben was just a couple of weeks ago. We talked about food, wine and his homemade bread rolls. Distraught doesn’t even come close. I will miss you incredibly Big Ben. You made everyone’s lives better with your big smile and your big hugs and I’ll never forget you, ever x
BFG xx
Lizzie Jenner
I don't know how but we managed to wangle our way into Ben's friendship group at school although they were 4 years older than us! Having welcomed us into the circle and age not being a problem, Ben taught me how to perfect drinking my first pint through a funnel at one of his infamous summer BBQ's, a skill I still treasure!
Many Christmas eves we spent together, one in particular I remember you climbing into my mum's car for a lift home with plastic boobs hanging around your neck and asking my mum if she wanted to feel them! (This was also her memory of you!). Fancy dress seemed to be your thing!!
Ben you were always the life and soul of the party, we never had a dull night with you and your friendship will never be forgotten. Taken far too soon, my thoughts are with your family at this desperately sad time, sleep well Big Ben xxxx
I will miss you mate.
Ryan
Ben. I will always remember with huge fondness, the fun and laughter that we shared together over many years and on many occasions. You were an inspiration to me as a client, as a colleague and as a friend. I will miss your larger than life personality, your quick witted humour and your incredible energy. You’re a true legend mate and I will miss you dearly. Rest in peace my friend. Ryan
Great friend and colleague
Prague friends
Ben was a great man with a big heart and will be sorely missed by all of us. Today we met in Prague to mark his passing - we are sure he would love this remembrance on Charles Bridge as it was a special place for him. We loved his visits to Prague and he was always great fun to be around.
A competitive gentleman
Jonathan Rollison
Such an unexpected shock.
When Ben joined Beverley Squash Club I knew he was destined for one of the top slots. Fiercely competitive, fair, fun and a true gentleman on and off court. It was always a joy to go into battle with or against the big guy.
Lost to us now but never forgotten. Thank you Ben for sharing some of your precious time with us.
Ben was a giant of a man on the squash court
Nick Leng
First time I played Ben at Beverley I remember him bellowing ‘Silly Boy’ obviously thinking he was shouting at me.... which he wasn’t. He’d put the ball in the tin giving me the point. Will miss our battles on the court Ben. A true gent and great great competitor in every sense of the word. RIP mate
Big Ben
Eddie May
I can’t actually remember meeting Ben for the first time, which is strange considering how loud he usually was. It would have been in the early stages of our time at Ecclesbourne school, and I know that it didn’t take long before he was firmly part of our group, and it felt like we’d all known each other forever.
It’s a special group, with friendships still going strong over thirty years later, and Ben was an integral part of why we all stayed close, even when geography, work, children and other aspects of life would have made it easy to drift apart.
Ben was, quite literally, a larger than life character. Big Ben, we called him, for fairly obvious reasons (and to distinguish him from Little Ben, who would later grow to a mere 6 feet 2).
His physical stature was part of what made Ben special. He was pretty hard to miss in a crowd, and just in case you did, his booming voice left you (and anyone within a three mile radius) in no doubt that Ben had arrived. Whenever I read Mr Noisy to my kids, guess who comes to mind?
And, of course, with that physical size came a prodigious capacity for drinking. He was unmatched there in both speed and quantity. But, unlike many people, drinking just made Ben even happier than he usually was - in all the big nights I’ve shared with him, I genuinely cannot remember him ever not being in good spirits and the life and soul of the party.
He was invariably in fancy dress (often when the occasion didn’t require it) and memories of Ben in full regalia, drinking his way up and down various town centres on any number of stag dos, are ones that I will always treasure.
But, much more than his large stature, it’s Ben’s big personality and enormous generosity of spirit that I think everyone will recognise and miss tremendously. He was always positive, always interested in others, always happy to help and always putting in the effort to stay in touch. Just in the last three weeks, when our little boy had to have an operation, Ben was texting to see if he was ok, and I know that many, many others will have had a similar experience of his caring, compassionate nature.
So many memorable moments with Ben. Too many to share (and some entirely inappropriate) but here are a few that spring to mind:
• A bank holiday eating competition in Sadler Gate one summer holiday. Pretty sure he won.
• Ben taking me to hospital for stitches on the first day of a holiday in Spain and using his GCSE Spanish to get me sorted out.
• Ben eating a Big Mac in one. The stuff of legend.
• Ben lurking menacingly, golf ball in hand, at any number of social occasions.
• Ben forcing me to wear a gimp suit on my stag do, and somehow making that seem ok.
• Ben tying a teacher to a tree on our sixth form leaving day, and somehow making that seem ok.
Taken far too early, and in his prime.
But he packed in several lifetimes’ worth of fun and friendships, and we can all take just a little bit of solace from that.
Goodbye, Big Ben.
Big brother
Seb
He was a really kind gentle giant when olly and i were little playing at the home in little eaton. I don’t know if you remember him picking you up ‘by your ears’ but I hope you do. He was very encouraging too about footy and other small things that felt important.
Mrs
Emma Owen
Ben was such a positive, friendly and welcoming person, he made everyone feel included. Ben always had a big smile on his face, even if you felt a bit grumpy you could count on Ben to cheer you up with a beaming smile or huge hug! I remember he told my husband and I recently that he had decided to respond to people in a different way to encourage everyone to be more positive, when asked how he was today he would reply “I’m fantastic/really good” and they at first seemed surprised with his response - but it was infectious and he found that this brought a smile and feeling of positivity to others around him. Xx
Fond memories ❤️
Karen England
Ben was in the year below me at school ...one of my brothers best friends, so we had many fun evenings together. I remember him as the life and soul of the party, so much fun, witty and charismatic. One of the last times I saw him was my 21st birthday. The chef at the palm court restaurant dated him to eat 2 of their biggest T-bone steaks.. he took the challenge, nailed it, was subsequently very sick! He made the night! He will always be fondly in my memories and I send all my love to his friends and family who were blessed to have him in their lives, taken way too soon xxxx
